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spanking the monkey, bashing the bishop, choking the chicken, having a polish, doing the five-finger shuffle, petting the poodle, rubbing one out, cranking the love pump, fiddling the flesh flute, going a couple of rounds with ol’ Josh, having one off the wrist, hitch hiking to heaven, letting the cat out of the bag, making a cash withdrawal, oiling the glove, making the bald man cry, manipulating the mango, preparing the carrot, pulling the pope, riding the five-legged pony, saluting the general, doing a secret handshake, slapping the donkey, smacking the salami, stretching the truth, taking matters into your own hand, washing the meat, wrestling the dragon, vacuuming Feeding the ducks, doing wrist aerobics tugging, pulling, visiting Mrs Palmer and her five daughters, visiting Rosy Palm. wrestling the one eyed trouser snake. wrestling with jimmy pocket pooling Clubbing the baby seal Arm-wrestling the one-eyed champ Punching the clown shaking hands with the unemployed Greasing the Cattle Lighting the Lampost Untying the Phone Chord verb the noun Waxing the Eldar Gate Trysting with Anon Kashogi Rereading the Republican Contract with America Morking the Mindy Appeasing Quetzelcoatl prodding the half-cooked pastrami raising lazarus from the dead going on the dole getting stripped of your grammy smoking hooch with reagan whiffing an easy fairway shot comforting gary coleman wearing a fat guys slacks mule breeding clamming the engram Torturing the political prisoner : Playing chess with Death : Exiling the dissident to Siberia : Arguing metaphysics with the Pope Shakin your Sir Francis Bacon Pinning St. Thomas Moore to the Floor Negotiating a seperate peace with Thomas a-Beckett Wave the writ of Habeus Corpus to the Sheriff of Nottingham Applying up and down friction to your errect penis, causing ejaculation Boxing the bald headed clown. Shaking hands with John Dillinger banging my bishop fingering the culprit playing tag in the foxhole "greasing the flagpole", "renting a boat for one at Central Park", "gilding the lily", "drilling for oil in your own backyard", "maintaining a holding pattern", engaging in "internal revenue service", "slopping the hogs", "hanging five", "trolling for flames", "lighting your pipe", "shifting into first gear", "setting off a depth charge", "unclogging your sink", "turning on, tuning in and dropping out", "visiting the notary public", "moving into a one-bedroom apartment", "polishing the silver", "docking in Shuttle Bay 5", "activating cruise control", "invading Poland", "stacking the deck", pounding my pudding creaming my cheese taming the animal Choking the chicken stroking my loaf whippin the wire lopin my mule goin with Ms Thumb & her four daughters "buttering your muffin", "applying for a fishing liscence", "launching the head of a world-cup golfer", "slipping yourself a mickey", "looking askance", rowing the little man in the boat polishing my pearl. "digging into the trenches", "running the 100-yard dash", flogging the dolphin "housebreaking the cat", "making a banana split", "roasting chestnuts", "playing a bass solo", "cleaning the storm-drains", "straining the spaghetti", "returning to sender", "installing a burglar alarm" making the bald man cry bopping my baloney Jerkin' yer Gerkin pulling the goalie polishing the Chinaman or se polir le chinois Playing "Othello" in Cardinal Spellmen's Mausoleum Doing the knuckle shuffle on my piss pump banging my drum cracking the shaft pushing my daisy and make it cum. "doing a little soft-shoe" beat the bishop beat your little brother beat the meat burp the worm butter your corn choke the chicken clean your rifle consult Dr. Jerkoff crank your shank dink your slinky feel in your pocket for your big hairy rocket file your fun-rod fist your mister flex your sex flog the dolphin flog the log flog your dog grease your pipe hack your mack hump your hose jerkin' the gherkin milk the chicken one-stick drum improvisation pack your palm paint your ceiling play a flute solo on your meat whistle play the male organ please your pisser point your social finger polish your rocket polish your sword pound the pud pound your flounder prompt your porpoise prune the fifth limb pull the pope pull your taffy run your hand up the flagpole shine your pole shoot the tadpoles slakin' the bacon slam your hammer slam your Spam slap your wapper spank the monkey spank the salami strike the pink match stroke the dog stroke your poker talk with Rosy Palm and her five little sisters tickle your pickle thump your pumper tweak your twinkie unclog the pipes

bashing the candle, Bleeding the weasel, bleedin the weed, buffing the banana, bopping the baloney, burping the worm, choking the chicken, cleaning your rifle, corking the bat, cranking the shank, cuffing the carrot, fisting your mister, flogging your dog, floggin the frog, flogging the hog, flogging the log, flute solo, jerkin'the gherkin, looping the mule, manual override, painting the pickle, pocket pinball, pocket pool, polishing the banister, polishing the rocket, pounding your flounder, pumping the python, roping the pony, spanking the monkey, teasing the weasel, tossing the turkey, walking the dog, whipping the willy, wonking your cronker, yanking the crank. A little five on one Abuse the fuse Adjust your set Anger the cobra Anger the pickle Answer the bone-a-phone Appease the cheese Arm-wrestle the one eyed champ Asexual reproduction Autofellatio Auto-manipulation Ax the timber Badger the witness Bag that ass up Bait the mast Bake cream cakes Bake the cheese Banana squeezing Bang yourself Bank off shoot goo Bash the bishop Baste the turkey Battle the Cyclops Be a loner Beat it Beat off Beat Pedro Beat the banger Beat the beef Beat the bishop Beat the bologna Beat the hog Beat the meat Beat the monkey Beat the morning wood (like every good boy should) Beat the one eye snake Beat the one eyed monster Beat the rat Beat the red-headed cock-eyed woodpecker Beat the shit Beat the stepchild Beat the stick Beat the weasel Beat up shorty Beat your cock Beat your gorilla Beat your pud Beat your skin Beatin' the baby batter Beef the jerky Beef-strokin'-off Ben your Franklin Bend the banana Bitch-slapping your stomper Blind the one eyed monster Blow a wad Blow the ceiling Blow up Blow wad Blow your load Blow your nose Boff up Bollock milking Bop the boa Bop the bologna Bounce Tigger Bounce your balls Box Oscar Box the clown Box the Jesuit Bringin' ya milk Buff the bullet Buff the pickle Burp the baby Burp the frog Burp the worm Bust a Nut Busting the left nut instead of the right one Butter the corn Call the captain Caress your zesty zambonie Chafe the squirtgun Charm the python Charm the snake Checkin' the Ol' Dipstick Cheesin Choke Choke the bishop Choke the chicken Choke the Choir Boy Choke the chubby Choke the monkey Choke the one eyed snake Choke the Pope Choke the sheriff and wait for the posse Choke the unemployed Chunking Churn butter Churn seed Circle jerk Clean the clock Clean the pipes Clear the snorkel Club the cucumber Cock blockin Cock pulling Cock smack Cock snot Come to daddy Corralling the tadpoles Crank it Crank one out Crank the cable Crank the crane Crank the gear Crank the one-eyed yogurt thrower Cream the cake Croke the frog Crown the bishop Cruzin' then Oozin' Cuff the carrot Cuff the carrot Cuff the monkey Cum and go Cum on self Cum on your tum Cum-lets-play Curl the honey Daily duties Dancing around the maypole Dancing with Mother Knuckle and her five daughters Dancing with the one eye sailor Dangle the Donkey Date Palmela Handerson Date Paula and her 4 sisters Date Rosie Palmer and her five sisters Date with Rosie bone and her five sisters Deal cards Deload the gun Despunk Destroying the slots machine Diddle your bob Do a load by hand. Do Mary Palm and her 5 sisters Do shoupa shoupa Do the dishes Do the janitor thing Do the Johnson and ball dance Do yourself Dog off Doing the Palm sisters Dong around Donkey punch Double Clicking The mouse Dr. Spankenstein Time Drain the dragon Drain the lizard Drain the pipes Drain the snake Drain the vein Drill for oil Drop a load before work. Drop the chalupa Drop the kids off at the pool. Duke your Jim Eat the egg Empty the banana Empty the pipes Empty your gunbarrel Erupt old faithful Erupt the volcano Exhaust the camel Exorcise your demons Extra long shower Fake fuckin' Favorite household activity Feed the donkey Feeding the chickens Feel it up Fiddle the ferret Fight one-eyed Willy Fight the one eyed purple warrior Fight the one-eyed monster Fight the purple helmet warrior Fight with Tarzan Fill u

Fill up your belly-button Fire out the hole Fire the cannon Fire the flesh musket Fire the pistol Fire the surgeon general Firing a shot from the grassy knoll Fist fucking Fist rocket Fist-humpin. Fisting Fisting your cock Five against one Five finger disco Five finger shuffle Five fingered widow Five knuckle shuffle Five on one Five versus Willy Five-fingered humpty hump love pump Five-fingered wife Fix the clogged drain Flick your dick Fling the pudding Flog the Bishop Flog the doggie Flog the dolphin Flog the dummy Flog the hog Flog the log Flog the man Flog the mule Flog the one eyed gopher Flog the ore Flog the sailor Flog your log Flogging Fly solo Fondle the dolphin Fondle the frankfurter Fondle the sausage Foreskin mambo Frag your snag Free the captive ninja Free Willy Freshen the air Friction burn Frighten the blue veined custard chucker Fry the chicken Fry the egg Fuck the chicken Fuck the udder Fuck your cock Fuck your fist Fuck your hand Fuck yourself Fucking for one Fucking mother thumb and her 4 daughters Fumble your frank Get a handle on things Get a hold of yourself Get off Get some me time Get sticky Get the job done Get to know yourself Give the dog a bone Give the dog a walk Giving Kojak the third degree Giving yourself a helping hand Go and have a slap Go at it Go blind Go down to the zipper mart to pick up a pound of pork Go for a spoof Go nut Grab the gusto Grab the handle Grab the meat Grapple the gorilla Grease the Pole Grease the rod Grease the wheel Great thoughts Greet Mr. Happy Greet the bishop Greeting Madam Palm and her 5 lovely daughters Grind the gopher Grind the groundhog Groom the Wookie Ham shank Hammer the lumber Hammer the helmet head Hand fuck Hand happy Hand hold Hand humpin' Hand jive Hand sex Hand shandy Hand Start the Yogurt Shooter Hand to Gland combat Hand to gland combat Hand, dick co-ordination Handle the merchandise Handy sandy Handy Shandy Hans Solo Harass the milkman Have a Barclays (Barclays Bank -- WANK - rhyming slang) Have a chug Have a frapp Have a tug Have a tug of war with Cyclops Have a wank Have fun Have sex with someone you love High-five Yule Brenner Hip the hop Hit the mitt Hitch-hike to heaven Hold the knob Hold the man Hold your baseball bat Hold your sausage hostage Home alone Homework Hone the bone Hump the hand Hump the Hebrew Hump the knob Hump the matress Idle hands Impregnate the air Increase the surface temperature of the ship's primary cannon using rapid linear motion Inside Slider with two balls Interrogate the prisoner Interrogate the witness Introduce Mr. Penis to Mrss Palm and her five lovely daughters Jack off Jack the beanstock Jack the frank Jack yo mac Jedi train in the bathroom Jerk and clean Jerk around Jerk it Jerk off Jerk pud Jerk the beef Jerk the chain Jerk the cum Jerk the general Jerk the Johnson Jerk the monkey Jerk the one-eyed snake Jerk the pet Jerk you shit Jerk your chain Jerk your gherkin Jerkin' the gherkin Jingle the Pringles Jingle your bone Jizsturbation Jock the sock Jog the joker Josh one off Juggle the balls Jump the pogo stick Just getting dressed Just going up to the office to use the photocopier Just gonna go lay down and take a nap... Just gonna go take a bath... Just need a little time with my e-mail, that's all... Keepin' the mortar clean Kill the gentleman Kill the Mr. Tingley Kneading the bread Knob thumping Knock one off Knock one off Knock the rock Knuckle shuffle Launch the hand shuttle Launch the rocket Lead pedro down the road of bulimia Leak the lizard Let Elvis leave the building Let loose the juice Lift your spirit Lighting the Roman Candle Liquidate inventory Log off Log the lumber Lollygagging Lope the mule Lope the mule Love yourself Lube the tube Lubricate the Lutheran Magic your Johnson Make a deposit Make cream Make friends with the lizard Make instant icing Make it spit Make it useful Make junior vomit Make love to Miss Michigan Make

Make one on one love Make one-eye cry Make Peter puke Make stomach pancakes Make the bald guy puke Make the bald guy puke Make the Cyclops cry Make the Cyclops fight the 5 headed monster Make the Cyclops spit Make the funny juice flow Make the one eyed monster puke Make the privates stand at attention, then fall in Make the snake puke Make your own hand lotion Makin babies Mangle the moose Manipulate your manhood Marry the moose Massage my palm Massage my stiff joint Massage out the stiffness Massage the salami Massage the soul Massage your balls Massage your clovers Meat off Meat-Beat Meet Mother Palm and her five daughters Meet the neighbors Meet the President Milk it Milk Murray Milk the beef Milk the cock Milk the cow Milk the goat Milk the hose Milk the lizard Milk the Magnesia Milk the Mickey Milk the one eyed trouser snake Milk the one-eyed snake Milk the one-uttered cow Milk your meat Milk yourself Molest the bystander Money comes out Monkey dance Move the joystick Mr. Happy and his five friends have a party. Mrs. palmer and her 5 daughters My Wife Nuke the whale Number 3 Oil the barber pole Oil the barrel Oil the Crank Oil the noodle One hand work out One handed pole vault One man and a hand One man show Our Gang Spanky Marathon Paddling the pony Paint Pontius Pilate's Palace Paint the ceiling Paint the wall Palm loving Pamela Handerson Pan for white gold Party for one Pat the monkey Pat the Robertson Pay bills Pay the pope Peel the banana Peel the carrot Peeling chilies Pet the bald eagle Pet the donkey Pet the ghurkin Pet the one eyed monster Pet the one eyed snake Pet the one-eyed gopher Pet the potato Pet the snake Pet the Willy Pet your third leg Pickle your peter Pimp pump Piston pushing Play a solo on my private organ Play ball with the boys Play five on one Play golf Play peek-a-boo alone Play pocket pool Play skin Banjo Play solitaire Play the bag pipe Play the meat pipe Play the skin flute Play tug of war with Cyclops Play with Burt Reynolds mustache Play with Fistina Play with Fred Play with lil' Elvis Play with Mr. Panky Play with myself Play with Peter Play with Pikachu Play with Rosey Palm Play with the pud Play with the purple headed yogurt slinger Play with Wally Play with Willy the wonder worm Play with your cock and balls Play with yourself Play your guitar Play Zelda Pluck the ducky Pluck the mushroom Pocket billiards Pocket fishing Pocket pool Polish Lord Helmet Polish the baton Polish the bishop Polish the candlestick Polish the dolphin Polish the helmet Polish the knob Polish the Ol' Torpedo Polish the one eyed gopher Polish the one eyed weasel Polish the Papal Podium Polish the pewter Polish the piston Polish the pope Polish the shaft Polish the silver Polish the sword of happiness Polish the torpedo Polish your Oscar Polish your pipe Polish your rocket Polish your whistle Polishing the periscope Pop the head Pop the pistol Pop the top off the Champaign bottle Portuguese pump Pound off Pound the flounder Pound the hammer Pound the pony Pound the pud Powder your nose Prime the pump handle Prune the shroom Pud pulling Pud whacking Puddin' Pull a quickie Pull and squirt Pull dinky Pull it Pull it hard Pull Nixon's nose Pull off Pull one off Pull one out of the bag... Pull pud Pull Stretch Armstrong Pull the chain Pull the cord Pull the dog's tail Pull the fun lever Pull the goalie Pull the meat Pull the noodle Pull the pickle Pull the pig Pull the pipe Pull the plowman Pull the Polish pork Pull the pork Pull the turkey Pull your plumb Pull your pud Pull your toy Pull your wire Pulling your Yankee Doodle Pump Pump jacks Pump mini me Pump sperm Pump the balls Pump the Pole Pump the watergun Pump your gun Pump your pud Pump'n the water rocket Punch the clown Punch the eclair Punch the monkey Punch the munchkin Punish Percy in the palm Punish the evil merchant Puppy whacking Pushing the envelope Put Mr. Kleenex's kids through college Putting Mayonnaise On The Garlic Bread Ram the rod Rattle the one eyed snake Ream the one eyed semen demon Release some steam Release the hounds Release the pressure Release the valves Relieve your sperm bank Relieving a little tension Relish up the hot dog Remove the rust Ricky Wrestling Ride the big dipper Ride The Dolphin Ride the rod Ride to heaven Ring your cock Rinse on Rocketing Rod yankin Roll dice Rolling the dough Rope the mule Rope your goat Rough up the little man Rough up the suspect Row the boat Rub a dub dub Rub it silly Rub one off Rub one out Rub the button Rub the faucet Rub the fireman's helmet Rub the knob! Rub the magic lamp Rub the pipe Rub the rhubarb Rub the rod Rub the sausage Rub the tool Rub your monkey Rub your nub Rubadubdub Run of

Run off a batch Salute the flag pole Salute the general Salute the scumlord Sausage stroking Say hello to Mr. Happy Say hello to the colonel of love Say hi to your monster Scramble the sausage Scrub the deck Self deflation Self diddle Self fuck Self fucking Self gratification Self indulgence Self motivation Self service Self sex Self-satisfaction Self-suck Sex with da hands Sex with Simon Shag your shank Shag-yer-self Shake hands w/the unemployed Shake hands with a pole Shake hands with Abraham Lincoln Shake hands with Ben Franklin Shake hands with Elvis Shake hands with Mr Peeper Shake hands with the ambassador of love Shake hands with the devil Shake hands with the governor Shake hands with the one eyed milk man Shake hands with the president Shake hands with the sheriff Shake hands with the unemployed Shake hands with the wife's wedding present Shake hot, white coconuts from the veiny love tree Shake it Shake my finger Shake off Shake the bottle Shake the goo off Shake the grapes Shake the old man Shake the pepperpot Shake the snake Shake the snake Shake with the tall guy Shake your fist angrily at your ex-girlfriend Shake your martini Shakin' the bacon Shaking hand with Colonel Sanders Shampoo the carpet Shampoo the moose Sharpen the pencil Shift with the manual transmission Shine the bishop Shine the car Shine the helmet Shine the pole Shine the spear Shine the telescope Shine the wood Shine your salami Shock the monkey Shoot for pearls Shoot hoops Shoot old yeller Shoot putty at the moon Shoot putty at the moon Shoot the gun Shoot the plane Short-arm stroking Shroom pullin' Shuck the corn cob Shuck the cornstalk Sin dirty with thy self Siphon the python Skin the sarge Skin the sausage Skin your frank Slam the ham Slam the stick Slap little Johnny behind the German helmet Slap spanky Slap the bishop Slap the carrot Slap the dick Slap the dummy Slap the ham Slap the salami Slap the salmon Slap the sausage Slap the stick Slap you cock Slay the dragon Slick the stick Slime the salamy slippery slippin' salami slipping Slobbin' the Milosevich Smack Smack baldy on the head Smack my pud Smack off Smack the burrito Smack the salami Smack your monkey Smelly jelly making Smoke the turkey Sneak a wink at wiggly Sock the cock Solo serve Spank frank Spank frank Spank it Spank it Spank Milo Spank off Spank one Spank that ass Spank the chicken Spank the dolphin Spank the hotdog Spank the money Spank the monkey Spank the old lady Spank the pup Spank the sausage Spank the Spam Spank your love life Spank your monkey Spank your pud Spanktervision Spanky's Revenge Speed shifting Spend time with an old friend Spewin' a white one Spill milk Spin the dreidel Spit da' sperm Spit shine the knob Splish Splah Sploshing Sporting the tent Spraying the belly with sticky white love-piss Spunk the monkey Spunk up Squeeze a few rounds off on the pump action shotgun Squeeze cheese Squeeze off a load Squeeze one off Squeeze the big guy Squeeze the Charmin Squeeze the Cyclops Squeeze the duck's head Squeeze the juice out the head Squeeze the lemon Squeeze the sausage Squeeze the squid Squeeze the tomato Squeeze the Twinkie Squeeze you lizard Squirt the Bert Squish the squid Stain the mitt Start the engine Start the lawnmower Stick it Stick shifting Stock Stoke the Strokin' stack Strangle the bishop Strangle the one-eyed trouser snake Strangle the snake Strangle the snake Strangle the warrior Stress reliever Stretch it Stretch one out Stretch the salami Stretching the truth Strike oil Strip the bark Stroke Stroke it Stroke off Stroke that big thing Stroke the chicken Stroke the choad Stroke the cock stroke the crank Stroke the ding-dong Stroke the dolphin Stroke the donkey Stroke the longhorn Stroke the manroot Stroke the monkey Stroke the mushroom Stroke the oar stroke the one-eyed snake Stroke the poke Stroke the puppy Stroke the salami Stroke the salami Stroke the schlong Stroke the shaft Stroke the slug Stroke the Snake Stroke the stick Stroke the strudel Stroke the stump Stroke the weasel Stroke the yoke Stroke your cock Stroking the dog Stroking the fireman Stroking the flagpole Struggle for life Strum the drum Strum your guitar Summon the jizz Swat off Swing the balls Swing the thing http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8q4ZL-KspQ

Tackling the totem Take a load off Take a ride on the slip n' slide Take a squirt Take batting practice Take Capt Solo on the Kessel Run Take Captain Picard to Warp Speed Take care of a big problem Take care of business Take matters in hand Take the edge off Take the sausage hostage Take your banana boat to tuna town Tame the beast Tame the one eyed spitting snake Tame the shrew Tame the vein Taming the purple headed warrior Tantalizing your toboggan Tap a teste Teach the dog a lesson Teach the monkey Tease the weasel Tease to please Teasing one out Tenderize the meat Tenderize the pork Tenderize the steak Test the probe Test the purple headed yogurt thrower Thawing the meat The gentle handshake The ol' 5 against 1 The penis pull The right hand maneuver The sofa The twist Thelma Thumb and her four sisters Think of your mom Thump the stump Thumping the stump Tickle the angus Tickle the meat curtains Tickle the peter Tickle the pickle Tickle the tentacle Tickle the tiger Tip the hat Tommy Tank Toot the horn Torture little Timmy Torture the monkey Toss off Toss the salad Touch the toucher Touch yourself Train the chicken Train the purple-headed warrior Tug the handle Tug the tassel Tug the turkey Tug your rope Tugging the boat Tug-O-War With Cyclops Turn Japanese Tweak your tool. Twiddle the bone flute Ugly Man Sex Unisex Unleashing Unload your gun Unsheathe the meat sword Up and down Use the joystick Vex the vicar Vice grip Virgin Love Visit the petting zoo Vote Republican Wag it Wag the dog Walk the dog Wang chungin Wang off Wank Wank and crank Wank it Wank off Wank the monkey Wank the pud Wank the sock Wank the wanker Wank the willy Wank your shank Wankin and spankin Wanky panky Wash the Buick Wash the rod Watch some pooh Wax the Bat Wax the bishop Wax the carrot Wax the chrome Wax the dolphin Wax the flagpole Wax the frog Wax the ol' Torpedo Wax the pole Wax the weasel Wax the willie Wax the Winnebago Weenie whacking Wet the whistle Whack it Whack jack Whack off Whack off like a red-headed stepchild Whack the Chalupa Whack the pole Whack the pud Whack the rod Whack the weasel Whack the wizard Whack the wood Whack your wack Whackin winky Whacking it Wham the bone Wheel it Whip it Whip pud Whip the noodle Whip the weenie Whip up some baby batter. Whippin' cream Whipping' it good Whipping the skippy White Water Wristing White water wristing Whittle the wood Whoop the mule Whoop your pudd Wind up the cock clock Wind your sun dial Windsurf on Mt. Baldy Withdraw from the spankbank Work out the third leg Workin' it Working the wiligger Wrestle the bald head champion Wrestle the champ Wrestle the turkey Wrestle with Jimmy Wrestle with the one eyed champ Wrestle with the one-eyed monster Wrestle with the one-eyed-trouser snake Yank off Yank the chain Yank the crank Yank the dog Yank the plank Yank the sausage Yank the Yankee Yankie the Wankie Yolk the egg To jerk off, to jack off, to whack off, to beat off, to crank on out, to thrash, to choke the (Chinese) chicken, to pinch the one-eyed snake, to slap the salami, to spank the dolphin, to flog the dolphin, to pull the pork, to polish one's gun, to shine the silver, to beat the bishop, to smack little johnny behind his German helmet and purple bulbous ear, to do the five knuckle shuffle, to make love with oneself, to beat around the bush, to flick the sausage, to punch the purple ninja, to juice the snake, to peel the banana, to milk the cow, to squeeze the purple-headed yogurt-slinger, to slap the monkey, to tame the dragon, to play pocket pool, to go bowling by oneself, to hit a homerun in the homefield, and yet, to strike out, to whittle the woodblock, to shimmy up and down the pole of love, to initiate the Saturn V, to turn on the sprinklers, to turn on one's love hose, to punch the clown in the nose, to tweek the deek, to hit the dick, to tallywhack, to soil the Kleenex, to smother the hanky

chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement. http://en.academic.ru/dic.nsf/enwiki/512041 http://leratop.ru/budushhaya-gospozha-byila-nemnogo-shokirovana-i-priyatno-udivlena-tokiyskiy-dekadans/

to grease the rod, to squash the bug, to shake hands with your penis, to squeeze the eclair, to fuck oneself, to awaken the slumbering giant, to flick the dick, to practice ju-dick-su, to train oneself in kung-penis, to play one's oboe, to rob the sperm bank, as well as take out a loan from one's sperm bank, to make your elephant laugh so hard that he squirts milk through his trunk, to shoot the shit, to cockadoodledoo, to make your worm sneeze, to visit the fountain of youth, to take a trip to Mexico with only one pair of underwear, to spray the butter, to spray the Cool-Whip, to get your "smack" on, to pump the hydrant, to evacuate one's testicles, to question the Mauve Avenger, to do the math, to calculate pi, to pleasure oneself manually, to practice stick-shift, to open the stairway to heaven, to save the whale, to squirt the mayonnaise, to attempt to reach orgasm in solitude (although not always), to climb/hike up pleasure mountain,to slap the Puerto Rican, to pour the salad dressing, to give an angel its wing, to kill a mockingbird.
To jack one's beanstalk.
Or, to choke one's chicken.

Господи, дай мне с душевным спокойствием встретить все, что принесет мне наступающий день. Дай мне всецело предаться воле Твоей святой. На всякий час сего дня во всем наставь и поддержи меня. Какие бы я ни получал известия в течение дня, научи меня принять их со спокойной душою и твердым убеждением, что на все святая воля Твоя. Во всех словах и делах моих руководи моими мыслями и чувствами. Во всех непредвиденных случаях не дай мне забыть, что все ниспослано Тобою. Научи меня прямо и разумно действовать с каждым членом семьи моей, никого не смущая и не огорчая. Господи, дай мне силу перенести утомление наступающего дня и все события в течение дня. Руководи моею волею и научи меня молиться, верить, надеяться, терпеть, прощать и любить. Аминь.
Когда МЫ сознательно обратим внимание на проблему, по которой надо принять решение или сделать выбор, ты создашь множество «Проблема». Проведешь мозговой штурм, при котором сформулируешь цель мозгового штурма и начнешь генерировать идеи решения данной проблемы на основе свободных ассоциаций и воображения, результатом которого станут альтернативные решения проблемы. Эти решения ты поместишь в множество «Проблема», каждое решение обработаешь процедурой «Отработать».
Затем ты проведешь систематизацию и классификацию решений.
Осуществишь деструктурирование решений, оценишь их реализуемость.
Из полученного количества решений отберешь наиболее оригинальные и рациональные. Данную процедуру будешь проводить до тех пор, пока не останется 10 решений. После проведения данного алгоритма отключишь логическое мышление.
Затем ты запустишь протокол «Октава» и как только закончится действие протокола на основе свободных ассоциаций, задействуя интуицию, выберешь одно решение, которое выведешь на уровень сознания, предварительно уведомив, что вывод получен в ходе работы этой процедуры.
Время, от окончания действия протокола «Октава» и выбора решения, должно стремиться к нулю.
Вся работа по протоколу «Выбор» будет тобой завершена в течение 15 минут земного времени или ранее, с момента первоначальной активации. Через 3 суток земного времени Ты, подсознание, промониторишь ситуацию с решением проблемы, сделаешь выводы, найдешь более эффективные методы составления алгоритмов и обработки материала, для использования ими в последующем. Выведешь осознание этого материала на наш сознательный уровень.

" I was taught wise, I'm known to extort guys
This ain't Cali, it's Harlem niqqa we do walkbys"

"Tout est dans nos mains, c'est pourquoi on ne les peux pas tomber"!

Эти русские непредсказуемы. Они уморили своих крестьян голодом. Они затопили плодороднейшие земли, чтобы сделать электростанции. Они загрязнили урожайные районы отходами от ядерной промышленности. У них небольшая плотность населения, но и при этом они ухитрились загадить свою страну настолько, что теперь вынуждены покупать зерно. Я думал, что умру от старости. Но когда Россия, кормившая всю Европу хлебом, стала закупать зерно, я понял, что умру от смеха. Сталин захватил аграрную страну и превратил ее в сырьевой придаток и ядерную помойку. Только Ленин мог бы вывести русских из того болота, куда он сам их завел. Но Ленина они успешно отравили. Через пару поколений они еще деградируют и не смогут самостоятельно даже добывать полезные ископаемые. Народ будет вымирать, а диктаторы и их слуги будут жить, покупая у нас предметы роскоши и продавая соседним странам концессии; для русских лидеров это самый выгодный бизнес. Так что если мы можем предотвратить их военную агрессию, то в интересах Великобритании, да и прочих Западно-Европейских стран, сохранять СССР как можно дольше: это выгодная сырьевая база и хороший рынок сбыта морально-устаревшей продукции. Они уничтожают у себя кибернетику и генетику - тем лучше для нас, мы будем продавать им семена и электронные устройства. Кроме того, за символическую плату в Россию можно будет сбывать ядерные отходы. Достаточно остановить советскую экспансию, и они уничтожат себя сами без каких бы то ни было активных действий с нашей стороны.
So just encase you don't remember me, I'll run your brain around the block to jog your fucking memory
Profite de la vie, elle est livrée avec une date d`expiration.

Наслаждайтесь жизнью, она поставляется со сроком годности.


Les meilleures souvenirs viennent des pires idées.

Лучшие воспоминания получаются из худших идей.


Si toi aussi, tu es d’accord avec certaines personnes juste pour qu`elles se TAISENT!

Ты тоже соглашаешься с некоторыми людьми лишь бы они ЗАМОЛЧАЛИ!


Chère Tequila, je t’aime, mais nous avons un accord. Tu étais supposée me rendre plus sexy et bon danseur.

J`ai vu la vidéo… Il faut qu`on parle…
Дорогая Текила, я люблю тебя, но у нас была договоренность. Ты должна была сделать меня более

сексуальным и хорошим танцором. Я видел видео … Нам надо поговорить …


LE WEEK-END, J`♥ LA MUSIC, J`♥ L`ETE & J`♥ DORMIR

ВЫХОДНЫЕ, Я ♥ МУЗЫКУ, Я ♥ ЛЕТО, Я ♥ СОН


Je n’ai pas trébuché, je sentais juste la gravité… qui fonctionne toujours très bien.

Я не споткнулся, я почувствовал гравитацию … которая до сих пор работала отлично.


Personne n’est parfait… jusqu’à ce qu’on tombe amoureux de cette personne.

Человек не совершенен … пока кто-то не влюбится в этого человека.

Mon être était semblable à une statue inachevée ;l amour m’a ciselé : je suis devenu un homme !

”Muhammad Iqbal.

Моя сущность была подобна незаконченной статуе; любовь меня отчеканила: я стал человеком!

"Merci d avoir enchanté ma vie.”Kyo, La dernière danse.

Будьте добры, очаруйте мою жизнь

"Misérable est l amour qui se laisserait mesurer.”William Shakespeare, Antoine et Cléopâtre.

Несчастна та любовь, которая позволила себя измерить

Je préfère mourir dans tes bras que de vivre sans toi.

– Лучше умереть у тебя в объятьях, чем жить без тебя.

L amour est comme une rose, sa beauté nous fait oublier ses épines. –

Любовь подобна розе, её красота заставляет забыть о шипах.

T aimer c est facile, te le dire c est dificile, mais t oublier c est impossible.

– Любить тебя – пр

10 июня 2013 в 01:10